My Mental Health Story | Mental Health Awareness Month
May is an important month for me not only because it’s AANHPI Heritage Month, but also Mental Health Awareness Month.
Growing up in an Asian household, taking care of our mental health was not something that was prioritized in my family. In fact, it was so stigmatized that for decades I had the impression it was “bad” to go to therapy, and as a result, I never quite learned how to properly deal with my thoughts and emotions in my formative years.
The week before my wedding, I had a breakdown. Kev and I were fighting so much that I was about ready to call things off if we couldn’t find common ground on our disagreements. I was irritable, snappy, and stressed beyond measure by that point. I remember crying to him, saying that I knew something was off about me, and that I needed to get help. A few months after we got married, I found a therapist and have been seeing them regularly ever since.
It’s now been 7+ years, and while I have learned and unlearned a lot since being diagnosed with moderate anxiety and depression, I can now look back and see that I was still struggling. I was high functioning and did my best every day to push through, but in reality, I wasn’t the best version of myself, especially to those closest to me.
For over a year, my therapist suggested I get on medication, and a few months ago, I decided to finally take the leap. It’s been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. My mood is more regulated, and little things that used to set me off don’t bother me as much anymore. I’m less overstimulated in my day to day, and instead of constantly being in survival mode, I’m happy to just exist. I used to love being busy, but now I’ve learned to find joy in the slower moments too.
Therapy hasn’t always been easy, but it has saved my life. I recognize that being able to see a therapist is a huge privilege, and I wish it was more accessible because I truly believe that everyone can benefit from therapy. Taking care of our mental health is equally as important as our physical health. No matter what you’re going through, please know that you are not alone. I see you and I’m sending you all my love.
xo,
Keshia